On Love
by Alain de Botton
I really enjoyed today’s book by Alain de Botton, which I
finished while sitting on a beach in upstate NY. The book is titled On Love in the US (and Essays in Love in the UK).
The brilliance of the book is the ease with which the reader moves
through the storyline and how the character evolves over time. The author writes in a way that speaks to the
emotions of anyone who has ever been in love.
The story moves chronologically and captures the phases of love through
introduction, getting to know one another (an awkward stage), falling in love,
staying in love, and then the crazy way love ends. A twenty-something man and woman meet on an air
flight from Paris to London, by chance sitting next to each other. After pleasantries and realizing how
different they are, a pseudo-comfort emerges, and here begins a journey of
love! De Botton captures every phase of
the process, naming each chapter: Romantic Fatalism, Idealization, Subtext of
the Seduction, Authenticity, Mind and Body, False Notes, Speaking Love, What Do
You See in Her?, Intimacy….you get the idea.
De Botton’s male character is an architect and falls for Chloe, a
hard-working business woman, who has been in love many times before. Each phase is tested by both characters, with
one taking the lead in the relationship at one point and the other at another
point until a sudden action changes it all (I’ll save the heartbreak for you as
this is quite a good read and don’t want to spoil it). I loved the stories and the intricacies of the relationship that is shared. It really does speak to anyone who has have
fallen in love, been dumped or is in love now. You will understand all of the
phases, the guidance that he provides, and have a chance to reflect on a
central question: what do you really want in a relationship? Great read.
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